Memorial/Celebration

I recently attended a memorial celebration for a person who'd passed on about two weeks ago. Remarkably, I feel I got to know the man better at this event than I did through our encounters when he was alive. It gave me cause to pause, to think over life and everything. I think that's what any memorial, remembrance, funeral, etc. should do. We take the actual death too hard; perhaps we should use it as a springboard to celebrate, reflect, and move forward as better people. That's how I was affected by the one I attended.

Back in the day, when death was more commonplace, people did not spend such outrageous sums (between $6,000 and 11,000 in the USA) on the dead. Family died in the home, were laid to rest humbly, were visited frequently. Ever seen a park bench in an old section of the cemetery? That's because people used to frequent the cemetery to reflect, to relax.

I've written on the funeral industry more than once, so I'll spare any regular reader that, again.

I will say, at least, that attending a celebration is much more motivational than a funeral. I was surrounded by the man's friends (some decades old!) , family, neighbors, and co-workers. The event summed up his life nicely, featuring his favorite snacks and drinks, pictures through the years, and fond memories and stories shared by those who mattered most to him. I aspire to be, like him, someone people will always treasure, always remember for the fun and funny moments as well as the flashes of responsible parenting, sincere caring, etc.

I often rewrite my obituary, but I think it would be a good practice in reflection and creativity to write an account of how my memorial might go, a celebration. Hopefully it would be like the one I attended, rather than what I fear: "Whew! Thank god he's finally dead!"