Wednesday, February 22, 2006

Head Cold

So, I'm brain dead, but today I have an excuse: a head cold. It makes me wonder over strange things when I'm all punked out like this. For instance, why does this ever-recurring issue have to be a head cold. Why couldn't I get a cold in some other, less essential part of my body? And...are people the only ones who get such an illness? I've never known a sloth or a rabbit or an elephant to have a head cold. (And I've been to the zoo plenty of times...never seen it yet!)

Even in this snot and drug-altered haze, I have to say: better a head cold than allergies. Better allergies than emphysema...better that than pushing up daisies, I guess. Nonetheless--ugh!

Cold medications make things taste like coins. (Yes, I've tasted coins. Suck on one like a lozenge sometime. You'll learn.) If you swallow a coin, someday you'll truly be worth something, my dad once said. Even without adding to your net worth through ingestion, you're worth something: When we total the monetary value of the elements in our bodies and the value of the average person's skin, we arrive at a net worth of $4.50! says Cool Quiz. And snot tastes like...don't get me started on snot. Sometimes it's a bit like oysters, othertimes more like Moo Goo Gia Pan sauce, if you ask me. (It's something no one ever wants to talk about...I just can't understand that!

I just sneezed. Ever seen someone sneeze when sitting in a shaft of sunlight? Nasty. Everytime we sneeze without covering our mouths (and even then, truth be told) we broadcast all this nasty moisture, everywhere! If you're really bored, you should look up the tradition of why we say "Bless You" when someone sneezes--bizarre. It's almost as bizarre as some mythical beliefs for the sources of snot, but I won't go there. Make it your own personal webquest. It's really nasty!

Enough for now. I think I'll take a nap on my desk.

1 comment:

John B. said...

I am feeling your pain, Deja, as I write this: I can't sleep because I can't breathe. But I really do not like the way cold medicines make me feel. I'd rather my head be filled with snot than with that weird brain wool induced by cold medicine.

Best wishes for a speedy recovery.