Really?

From time to time I'm asked by students, "What should we call you?" I know all the answers from teacher training, how a degree of distance is appropriate, how getting too chummy is certain ruination, etc. I pause and think of what I call people I should respect, say, like my doctor . I use his title, sure, but not "Dr. Boris Smartgui, MD. sir" when addressing him.

Their question always throws me into a tailspin, considering all the ramifications of the education system established as it is, with the Imparting of Knowledge in exchange for a Degree, a Rite of Passage into a Career rather than a Job. That whole thing.

Yes, I am in this line of business (and yes, Pollyanna, it is a business), and yet I question its validity. I know that in some small way I am helping people better express themselves and think more critically and all that. I know other classes advance students a bit here/there...but really, is it the best format in this day and age?

I am leaning ever-more toward what we call "blended" classes at my college. In this delivery format, the content is online; students are to read their texts and online content, then come to class to wrestle with it for comprehension, clarification, and generally get the face-to-face time that many still benefit from. I lean toward this, for it is how I learn. I don't wait around for people to tell me something in a lecture; instead I go find it online and soak it up, then return to someone local w/questions. It works for me.

In this age of aliases, avatars and alternate identities, I realize that one could become quite the poser online, even in education. Is this any different from a guy in a tie behind a podium? That is no more me than the text "me" of my online instruction. It's a uniform, a standard of performance and delivery that is expected and sometimes needed to convey content and build confidence.

Last summer I had a couple of college guys come work on my place. After a few days, one of them said, "You know, you're like a different person out here." I pressed, he added, "I mean, you don't even wear a tie." Regardless of how impractical a tie might be in any circumstance, it is just not the fashion accessory to accompany jeans, boots, and a t-shirt, to say nothing of the inherent dangers of getting it snagged in a PTO or weed-eater. His comment resonated throughout the summer, as he continued to marvel that I ate, slept, drank, spoke--like anyone else.

I wonder, as I am sure others do, just who I really am. What would I really like to be called? What's my true name? All other expectations and utilitarian standards aside, what would I really wear. Really.